Monday, November 7, 2011

emotions on the ebb

The past week or so has actually been pretty good, emotion-wise.  I've been sick, so congested and miserable that I missed a day of work, but the fact that I haven't been able to dwell on our adoption loss has been a good thing.  I'm thankful that each day brings something to make me smile and if I stay busy I don't think to much about it.  Sometimes. 

ps.  I love this photo of my Phoebe's paws...isn't she dainty?

The truth is, of course, that this time of year is hard on us still waiting adoptive parents, thinking of all that could be and should be and isn't yet.  My birthday is coming up and then Thanksgiving and then Christmas, and we had all sorts of plans for the twins.  There were ornaments I saw in a store that said "baby's first Christmas," and there were Halloween outfits that we liked and baby announcements that I thought were cute, and a mostly finished nursery that we walk past everyday. 

Our case worker is coming for a visit next week and I thrilled about seeing her for a more social kind of visit.  We're going to have dinner and chat and visit and hang out.  I'm glad to see her have a more relaxed time.  We've been with our agency long enough that we really have bonded with them, and they've seen us through all these peaks and valleys.  

Hope all is doing well with each of you and that you aren't dreading these next couple of months and dealing with the holidays empty handed. 


Alison said...

Sigh. I'm so sorry, friend. I'm praying for you!

JellyBelly said...

The holidays are always the toughest time. I try not to dwell on the passage of time that my arms continue to be empty.

Continued prayers in your time of waiting.

Frizzy said...

I love your heart and your continued positive spirit. Thank you for the email last week. We are breathing again with huge sighs of relief from the news we received. Like you, we continue to wait while the crib remains "empty."

Lucky for us, Nevaeh has decided to put the crib to good use and has filled it with her dolls and stuffed animals while we wait. Might be difficult to convince her it's for the baby not her toys when/if he or she finally arrives.

"All in His Perfect Timing" said...

Yes, little paws are SO CUTE!!!
The holidays are going to be hard. I'm sorry for the disappointment in not being a mom for your birthday this year and for the holidays ahead.
Praying hard for your dream to come true!!!

Kenda said...

Love you Sissy. I'm sorry this journey has been so long and so hard. I know the day will come when it will all be worth it -- don't forget that -- but until then, know that you're loved and prayed for. K